(Part: 20A He Loves Me too) Love Or Sin {Sidnaaz}


Shehnaaz woke up in an unfamiliar room next morning. The room heater was on, and she was wrapped in a heavy blanket but still, she was feeling cold. Flashes of last night came into her mind as she closed her eyes. She vividly remembered she had fallen asleep in his arms. The night which could have taken her life, that night had become her most memorable night. Being in his arms, she felt like she was in heaven. She could spend her whole life happily in his arms.

“I wish, you could be mine, Sidharth. It hurts a lot when I see you with another girl. I will never able to forget last night. You were so close to me. At that moment I was feeling like you were not only touching my body, you were touching my soul. I could never forget last night. It was the best night of my life.” A contented smile touched her lips as she wondered about the last night. She was smiling wholeheartedly after so many days remembering about last night. It was a magical moment which she could never forget.

“But what would be Sidharth thinking about me? How will I face him?” Her smile faded into a frown as she recalled how she had confessed her love to him last night.

“What is happening, God? Now what I will do? Sidharth will have lots of question. What I will say to him ?” Shehnaaz was so lost in her thoughts that she didn’t even come to know when Sidharth came out of the washroom and stood beside the bed.

“How are you feeling now ?” She was startled and instantly looked at him as she heard his voice. He was looking at her worriedly. Last night he was horrified after seeing her condition. At one moment he felt like he lost her.

“I… I am better.” She stammered, answering to him, and she was playing with her fingers inside the blanket. Her gaze was fixed down on the blanket, she couldn’t look into his eyes because of her last night confession.

“How are you?” She asked, looking up at him. He was gazing at her and instantly moved his eyes down as she looked at him. Their heart was beating fast because of the presence of each other.

“I am fine,” He passed a small smile to her.

“Is this your room? And when did you bring me here?” She asked him and sniffed, rubbing her nose. She had a cold and high fever.

“Yes, this is my room.” He took out the hanky from his pocket and gave it to her. She smiled faintly while taking it, and they gazed into each other eyes for a second.

“When you became unconscious last night, that time only a worker opened the door. I brought you here and called the doctor. The doctor said you will be fine in a few days.” He told her, and she was rubbing her nose with the hanky and sniffing.

There was a knock on the door. “Come in.” As Sidharth said, a maid stepped into the room after opening the door with a glass of warm water. She wished good morning to Shehnaaz. She passed a faint smile to him in response. She was feeling so weak and her head was blasting because of the fever and cold.

“Sujata, help mam in getting up.” Sidharth took the glass of water from her hand and ordered her to help Shehnaaz. Sujata gave a slight nod to Sidharth and helped Shehnaaz to sit against the bed while he picked up the medicine from the side table. He gave her the water and medicine. Shehnaaz took them mutely.

“Sujata, bring breakfast for Madam.” Sujata left after nodding her head.

“Shehnaaz, Shivansh was worried for you because you were not picking up his call last night. Talk to him.” Shehnaaz slightly nodded at him and Sidharth gave her the phone. In this, as their hands touched and a shiver of desire ran down their spine.

“Please, don’t tell him about last night. I didn’t tell him because I didn’t want to make him worried.” Sidharth spoke, and she swiped open the lock of her phone.

She looked at him. “Okay.”

“How are you, Shehnaaz? Why you were not picking up calls last night? Do you any idea that how much I was worried for you ?” Shivansh chided her after picking her call instantly like he was waiting for her call only. Shehnaaz closed her eyes dejectedly because she was feeling guilty seeing his care for her. She was feeling more guilty after the last night.

“Shivansh, I slept as soon as I came back home from the party. I was so tired. I am sorry.” She replied him back after composing herself. She apologised from him and tears welled up in her eyes. She was apologising him for lying to him every day and because she couldn’t love him.

“Okay, fine but never do this again, and listen take care of yourself. I have a meeting. I will call you as soon as I get free.”

“Okay, you too take care of yourself.” She wiped her tears and hang up the call.

“I am sorry, Shivansh. I can’t tell you the truth because I can’t break your heart. I know, you will be shattered after knowing the truth.” Shehnaaz cried in guilt and pain palming her mouth.

On the other hand, Sidharth was sitting in the hall, holding his head with his hands, and he was stamping his foot. The memories of last night were making him weaker. The way Shehnaaz was begging him to let her die, it was shocking for him. Last night he came to know she loved him a lot.

“Now I am just confused. I don’t know, what I should choose, Love or Friendship. After seeing Shehnaaz’s love for me, I just can’t live away from her. She loves me so much like the way I love her. She needs me the way I need her. She was yearning for my love the way I am yearning of her love. I just can’t control my feelings more. Oh god… whom should I choose?” After seeing the depth of Shehnaaz’s love. Sidharth was confused for the first time that what he should choose between love or friendship.

“Why, Shehnaaz? Why? Why did you fall in love with me? If I choose you, then I will lose Shivansh forever. I just can’t afford to lose him. His friendship is my strength. I will never able to live happily without his friendship. Whenever I have become weak, his friendship has given me strength. His friendship is like a blessing of god to me. I can’t lose it. I am nothing without his friendship… nothing. His friendship gave me a new life. How could I choose the love of a few days over the friendship of many years ?” He was questioning himself and he was going crazy.

“No, I will always choose friendship over love. Shehnaaz’s love is nothing in front of Shivansh’s friendship. Shivansh’s friendship is most important for me. I can do anything to protect our friendship. I can spend my whole life alone without a life partner but I can’t spend my life without his friendship.” He got up, staring straight. At last, Sidharth again chose friendship over love.

Will he ever choose Love over Friendship? Will that day come when he will keep his love above his friendship?

Part: 20B He Loves Me too

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